So I was just talking with a young colleague I hadn\u2019t seen over the summer. He\u2019s hipster handsome and slim, has the regulation black-framed glasses, and rocks what I like to think of as a \u201cBrooklyn Beard\u201d: thick, dark, lustrous, well-tended but not fussy. A low-key statement beard.<\/p>\n
That beard of his looked way more luxuriant than the last time I\u2019d seen it (and him) when our paths crossed at the gym. You know the kind of beard I mean. Some people love \u2018em, some hate \u2018em.<\/p>\n
\u201cYour beard is a work of art,\u201d I said. \u201cIt deserves a name.\u201d That part was a joke, but I was seriously fan-bearding him.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt has a name,\u201d he said. \u201cI call it \u2018Red.\u2019 \u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cActually, I just named it right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
We both laughed because it was coal-black, but the name fit because of the quiet incongruity. I could already imagine people referring to him as \u201cYou know, that guy with the black beard he calls \u2018Red.\u2019 \u201d<\/p>\n
I was inspired by his irony. In the same spirit, right then and there I christened my beard \u201cErik\u201d after the Norwegian Viking, Erik the Red. I think that was already making my colleague and me beard bros.<\/p>\n
Now, my beard isn\u2019t as lush as his, and it\u2019s got various colors shot through with red like my Dad\u2019s, rather than one solid hue. And the reason for the name was multi-layered as well. It dated back to all my travels in Germany and elsewhere in Western Europe where people often took me for Norwegian because of my coloring\u2014and the beard. And because if they heard me speak German, French, or Dutch they couldn\u2019t tell where I was from, but they never thought my accent was American. Now and then someone outside Germany might ask if I was German, but everywhere the predominant guess was Norwegian.<\/p>\n
Even a Norwegian once asked where I was from in his country, and likewise a Swede sitting next to me on a flight back from Berlin told he was surprised when I asked him a question in English. He, too, thought I was Norwegian. Being mistaken for Norwegian has happened to me on a regular basis when I\u2019ve been over there. Sadly, I\u2019ve never had the chance to learn any Norwegian, just tourist Swedish (which a friend with Swedish relatives said is surprisingly good). Because I would have loved to fake it, just for a little while.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou know, we need a web site,\u201d I said to my beard bud. \u201cFor guys who name their beards.\u201d<\/p>\n
He nodded. \u201cToo right.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBecause we can\u2019t be the only ones.\u201d I hesitated. \u201cBut what do we call it?\u201d<\/p>\n
He considered. \u201cHow about ‘Guys Who Name Their Beards’?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cToo literal. Maybe ‘Dudes With Beard Names’?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes! Uh, no. It sounds\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201c\u2014yeah, it sounds like they have a problem and need therapy, or a talk show.\u201d<\/p>\n
We both fell silent, and then he smiled: \u201cLet\u2019s go with ‘Our Beards, Ourselves.’ \u201d<\/p>\n
Lev Raphael<\/a> is the author of 25 books in genres from memoir to mystery.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" So I was just talking with a young colleague I hadn\u2019t seen over the summer. He\u2019s hipster handsome and slim, has the regulation black-framed glasses, and rocks what I like to think of as a \u201cBrooklyn Beard\u201d: thick, dark, lustrous, well-tended but not fussy. A low-key statement beard. That beard of his looked way more … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[923],"tags":[945,932,931,925,947,934,946,935,933,944,924,930,926,943,941,942,936,937,216,928,927,929,940,938,939],"class_list":["post-2827","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-beards","tag-beard","tag-beard-bros","tag-beard-buddies","tag-beard-care","tag-bearded","tag-beardedmen","tag-beardgang","tag-beardlife","tag-beardlove","tag-beardoil","tag-beards","tag-bros","tag-grooming","tag-hair","tag-haircut","tag-haircuts","tag-hairstyle","tag-hairstyles","tag-humor","tag-men","tag-men-with-beards","tag-mens-grooming","tag-menshair","tag-mensstyle","tag-menstyle"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2827","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2827"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2827\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5507,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2827\/revisions\/5507"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2827"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2827"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.levraphael.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2827"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}